Sometimes I just don’t know what to say in this blog. I try to remain upbeat most of the time because that is me. Some times this is hard though and today is one of those days.
Ever since I was admitted to hospital I have been struggling with my eating and drinking again. It seems to get a little easier and then goes really haywire again. Taking my tablets is now a daily battle. It’s currently 4.30pm and I have just finished taking my morning medication. What made it so much worse was one of my tablets didn’t go down when I swallowed and started to break up in my mouth. It tasted awful and this in turn made me start to heave. It’s such a horrible feeling and the thought that I have to take a load more before I go to bed fills me with dread. I have tried milk, milk shakes, Coke, various juices and water. Currently nothing helps me swallow the blasted tablets.
I’m also not enjoying or fancying any food. Again every meal time is a battle. I so wish I had a magic wand sometimes. I want to be well but not eating and drinking and being unable to take all my medication is not going to help.
I feel very weak most of the time and so tired. It’s the kind of exhaustion that no matter how much sleep you’ve had you still feel shattered. If you can imagine having 9-10 hours sleep and waking up tired. Then having a nap and waking up tired again. Then sitting and watching TV in the evening and nodding off again. This goes on day in day out.
I’ve been getting fidgety because I haven’t been out. The snow has not helped but as today was warmer and the snow has cleared, I decided to get my mobility scooter out and go for a “walk” The thermometer said it was 9. It certainly didn’t feel like that. I had wanted to go to the shop but gave up half way and came home to the warm. I feel like I’m going backwards at the moment. I have no strength in my legs. It’s like my get up and go has got up and gone.
I really want to start getting up to mischief but I don’t have the energy. I really want to embrace the unfolding spring. I’d love to go on holiday somewhere warm. I also wish I could take my tablets easily and eat more normally.
I suppose all I can do for now is grin and bear it and hope that things improve soon.
Your thoughts, prayers and positivity are welcomed at this challenging time not only for me but for those closest to me too.
Thanks for sticking with me.
Love and hugs Kes...... I too would love to have a magic wand to make miracles happen. I wish I could come to you and together we could take a few faltering steps out in this Spring like sunshine, if you promise to travel very slowly so that I can keep up with you. We needn't go far, just far enough to fill our lungs with fresh air.
ReplyDeleteNear where I live we have a small copse, Warley Woods... its a wooded park with a golf course and a tea room, it would be the ideal place to go, we could chat in the warm afterwards in the cafe over a mug of tea.
How long had you been in hospital? I hadn't realised that you had.
Talking medical, I have just completed my first set of questions for a survey being done into HOW DOES MDS AFFECT YOUR LIFE, it’s a survey from Hereford UNI. You know the ones, never, sometimes often, all the time. One question was HOW DID MDS AFFECT YOUR SEXUAL AROUSAL THIS WEEK, well nothing applied to me so I wrote, HAVEN'T BEEN THERE, LOL
They are also checking how long it takes for folk to do the survey...
You need what I need Kes, someone with a bit of time to spare during the day to get us motivated again.
Mr Motivator ???? do you remember him.
Sending hugs and loads of love. ♥
Sorry only just seen this comment
DeleteOh dear darling Kes you are really going through. I am praying for you and your family. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you. I live fairly near Kings and can get there at short notice if you need me.
ReplyDeleteSorry Diana I’ve only just seen this. Xx
Delete